I’ve joined the modern age at last. I have a mobile phone, a DVD player and now a microwave oven.
I resisted the oven for years. All those microwaves flying loose about the house, who knows what damage they could be doing and what awful consequences of random radiation?
Would it reverse the air conditioning? Turn on the garden sprinklers? Give the budgie a brain tumour?
But my Council Home Help Girl insists the oven is safe and it wouldn’t matter if I became suddenly sterile anyway. So I now have this white box on my kitchen bench and the Girl is bringing me a little bag of wheat that you pop into the microwave, enter a PIN number or something and there you have it — a sort of waterless hot water bottle.
I’ll believe it when I see it.